Christmas Part 1: Music

The Christmas season is finally upon us!

Yes yes yes yes yes

Christmas is the best. Writing about Christmas is the best. And it also means that fourth quarter has finally slowed down. HALLELUJAH!

Christmas music is basically the same game as the post about Pumpkin Spice that was back in October. There are two sides to this war. You should know what they are, where you fall and, in turn, who your enemies are.

Ho.

Ho.

HO.

The sides of this battle are pretty clear – there are those who think Christmas music is fair game year round, and then there are those of us who are right and who wait for Christmas music until the day after Thanksgiving when God intended for man to listen to Christmas songs.

Let me list some reasons why Christmas music belongs on the latter side of Thanksgiving exclusively:

  1. Songs Themes – Christmas songs are about things like snow and winter. Singing about snow and winter during the summer makes ZERO sense unless you live in the southern hemisphere, in which case it’s cold during the summer (even though Christmas still falls during the hot season). You guys down there will have to figure this one out for yourselves. But for the rest of you… get it together. Sheesh.
  2. Respect for Other Holidays – Each holiday deserves due attention on the day it has been given. You’re being plain rude to be like “Hey Fourth of July, sorry that you’re really important and stuff, but I really need to hear someone sing about mistletoe rather than celebrating our nation’s Independence Day.” Nice. Classy. I shouldn’t even need to explain why this is plain wrong. *rolls eyes*
  3. Common Sense – Most importantly, common sense should take precedent. When you have a class of songs that are named explicitly for the holiday they center around, that is the time of year that you should be listening to them – when there are no other holidays that sit between you and Christmas. Oh, is it October but you want to hear Michael Bublé sing about snow and presents and Santa? Well, stop it. Go listen to Monster Mash instead, you impatient Millenial. You ever hear of anyone asking to listen to Monster Mash during Christmas time? No, because people only listen to Halloween songs during Halloween time. That’s how the game is played. Same logic applies to Christmas.

And if nothing else, listening to Christmas music all year takes away the anticipation of being able to break them out at the appropriate time and enjoying them as if you were seeing a good friend for the first time in a while. Why would you want to take that away?

You don’t. So stop. But for now, go enjoy some Christmas jams (since it’s finally the right time).

Warm Regards,

A Fellow Office Worker

Sidebar: I’m kind of dying to do a post on Starbucks, their Christmas cups and the ‘war on Christmas’ as part of a Christmas series for the blog. I’m curious if you’d be interested in seeing it.

If you’d be so kind, comment below and tell me if you want to see a post like this as part of a Christmas series leading up to the big day!

the-office-christmas-party

Photo: NBC


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