Animal Calendars

So there’s this calendar I have in my cubicle – your run of the mill, different animal every month calendar. It’s got your standard wildlife too: a frog. a ladybug. a bird.

You get it. Animals.

What they don’t tell you about run of the mill calendars is how excited you can be when you get them (and get them for free).  I thought my life was changing forever when that thing plopped down on my desk. 12 months of cardstock glory that could somehow count the days better than the calendars on my email or phone could ever hope to.

A different animal every month?! And they’re all mine!?

Swag. Swag. Swag.

Fast forward. It’s April. Somehow, Arizona isn’t a blazing furnace yet. Miracles are happening. I’ve probably just eaten a Lean Cuisine for lunch (as one does in Cubicle City). And where does my calendar sit? Open to February, with the little frog in the water that I drew a bow tie on, still visible in all his accessorized glory.

Swag. Swag. Swag.

If I did my job the way I flipped my calendar pages, I would be more tardy on deadlines than my high school senior self and would find myself looking for a job with the same desperation I had searching for colleges later that year. Because my butt would be FIRED.

Fail. Fail. Fail.

I guess what we’re to learn from this is three-fold:

  1. Monthly paper calendars don’t change your life the way you thought they might.
  2. Free stuff is still pretty great, even if you’re just hoarding it. So grab as much as you can. Because free (see previous post about the joys of free food).
  3. I’m clearly not ready to make adult decisions if I can’t handle calendars.

But that’s another discussion for another time. And I don’t wanna talk about it. So… Bye Felicia.

Career Builder Koala


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